Q. My husband and I have been together for over 16 years. I’m 34 and he’s a few years older. I’m the one who wants to have sex more often.
I love him. He is a great guy, but sex once every three months is so frustrating to me. I would prefer two or three times a week.
I initiate love-making most of the time. I try not to ask but it’s so hard to just keep my sex drive to myself. I want the intimacy. I wish I could just take a pill to make me uninterested in sex.
A. Although there are some medicines that lower sex drive as a side effect, we cannot recommend them. They can cause too many other possible adverse reactions.
We recently heard from a woman who reported that drinking spearmint tea morning and evening reduced her overactive libido. Research indicates that spearmint tea can lower testosterone levels, which might help to explain this effect (Phytotherapy Research, Feb. 2010).
Another reader tried this approach and wrote: “The spearmint tea truly does work for decreasing sex drive. As a female with previously high sex drive, I’ve been greatly relieved by this. It has brought more harmony to my marriage. I had to drink it for a few weeks before I noticed the effect.”
You and your husband may also find counseling useful. We hope the spearmint tea helps.