Genital Herpes Prompts Thoughts of Suicide

I have had this for 27 years, having contracted it when I was 19. Since then, I have married, and I have 2 children. I have symptoms at times, and have tried many different things including Valtrex, whick does work.

However, I have gone back to an old standby - lysine. I last took it 2 or 3 weeks ago, and haven't had an outbreak since. There is an online protocol for taking it, and the key is taking a LOT of it, up to 20.000 mg. a day (that is not a misprint), along with some other common supplements, for a few days.

Until I adjusted the amounts correctly, I had diarrhea, but that was a miniscule price to pay for the relief I have received. I believe the website is herpes-be-gone.

http://www.dc-h2o.com/

This is a local (MD/VA/DC plus) support/social group for people with HSV and HPV. There is no cost associated with this group and people can participate as much or as little as they choose.

All this lady needs to do is post a hello or "help message" on the message board and there will be a number or welcomes and offers of support in various ways.

Please encourage her and/or any other people who come your way, who have HSV and/or HPV to check out this website.

Some of the people involved have had the disease for 20+ years. Some just found out recently but no one regrets getting involved with this group. I have been with them since 2001.

It will change her life.

Thank you.

I have had herpes for 20 years. I was young and initially did not know what it was. It was another 10 years before I found out. By then, the outbreaks were less frequent [about 1 every 3 months instead of every few weeks when I was first infected; I thought it was a heat rash or something] and lasted only a short time, although they were still annoying.

My doctor gave me Famvir, but I can't say it really helped, but it did make me queasy. About 2 years ago, I started taking the vitamin L-Lysine. This is where I am going to disagree with the other poster. I take 1500 mg a day, [500 mg with each meal to be exact] and I haven't had another breakout in all that time. You can take as little as 1250 mg a day, but I have not been able to find a lower amount than 500 mg tablets.

I have had no side effects to the L-Lysine. I also take 25 mg of Zinc per day. It is also said to help. Avoid the vitamin Arginine and foods with high levels of it. It's important the you have more L-Lysine in your system and less Arginine to keep outbreaks at bay.

I'm not saying this is a cure, I am saying it has worked for me. Having herpes really has no effect on my life one way or the other. I have children and a wonderful husband.

By the way, when I see that commercial for Valtrex it always makes me mad. It says that one study found that 70% of people became infected by their partners when they didn't have an outbreak. Sounds scary, huh? Not so much. People tend to focus on that "70%" instead of the words "one study". One study!!! They could have studied only 5 people. That's crap!

My husband and I abstain during an outbreak, otherwise we don't even think about it. He gets tested every year at my insistence and is still herpes free. Don't let it ruin your life or make you feel like taking your life. It is manageable. Herpes meds are also used to treat shingles, so your pharmacist won't know for sure why you are using it and you can always get samples from your doctor or a clinic if you want to save face. The person who gave it to me knew they had it, knew they had a breakout and did not tell me. I've never been a promiscuous person, but I was young and naive. I am thankful I have an understanding husband. Anyone worth having will understand.

Herpes is common and a lot of people have it and don't know. Try the L-Lysine and Zinc. It couldn't hurt and may help. I can't imagine that anything else has given me the 2 years of relief I am now enjoying.

Your advice to your reader with genital herpes was excellent. It sounds as if she needs to talk with a counselor or health practitioner who can calm her anxieties about this condition. I was fortunate enough to have a nurse practitioner who shared with me the fact that she, too, had genital herpes and how she learned to live with it. (Thank you, my friend!)

The one thing your reader needs to know is that herpes outbreaks generally become less painful with time. The lesions can be very painful in the beginning, but they gradually lessen in severity.

Even though we may not want just any stranger to learn of our condition, we eventually learn to live with herpes safely and to keep it under control, without spreading the virus, simply by using care and moderation during outbreaks.

As with any other virus, keeping a positive attitude and a healthy immune system will help keep herpes from flaring up and shorten outbreaks. What works, besides the medication? Daily probiotics (I have found "Daily-Dophilus" by Country Life to be the best probiotic I've tried so far) as well as regular exercise, a healthy diet (moderation is the key) and taking a high-quality daily multiple vitamin formula with ample B vitamins.

In addition, rest and a good night's sleep, yoga and other stress reduction methods such as meditation, listening to music you love (or doing just about anything you enjoy doing), and avoiding strenous activity that you're not used to, can help keep the outbreaks to a minimum and reduce the duration of an outbreak.

Once an outbreak occurs, resting and using dietary manipulation helps: eat foods high in lysine and low in arginine.

All the best to your reader!

I was diagnozed with herpes over 25 years ago. My partner had no genital symptoms, but had a cold sore on his lip, which was determined to be the cause.

I am totally into natural remedies and NEVER take medications. I grow Aloe Vera, broke off several stalks and saturated my genitals with it. It was immediately soothing. The lesions disappeared in a few days and I HAVE NEVER HAD A REOCCURANCE in over 25 years.

1982 At age 26 my sister married a awful person who we would all later learn was "pure anything goes scum". He gave her various VD's including herpes. She reacted like the author and was about to harm herself

we asked her to think of her child. An Italian lady that worked with our Mom told her to eat kiwi fruit had also suffered the same condition and that the immune systems deals with it better in time. She said in her country they use it for herpes 1&2 and did not understand why americans were using such strong meds for the condition.

As soon as I read your post, I felt compelled to write. I also have herpes and have had it for about 20 years now. I remember my diagnosis in my early 20's and thinking it was a death sentence - I would be destined to a life alone, embarrassed and shunned as I had an STD. Not so - not at all. Only a few years later, I fell in love with a wonderful man who the herpes didn't matter to him (as it shouldn't), have two great children and a super life. We've been married now for 16 years. We were not as careful (as one of the other readers above) and my husband contracted herpes a short time after our marriage.

The outbreaks for both of us are not severe and the older we get, the less in occurrance. Please do not worry about filling ANY prescription as so many medications nowadays are used for so many different things - i.e. The pill for acne, etc. And, jokingly, you sure don't have to walk in to the pharmacy and say "Hey there! Can I have my HERPES PRESCRIPTION?" The checkout girl doesn't even look at the bag when checking you out. It's no different from to the drug store for Tampax or yeast infection cream.

Please do not feel helpless. There are so many people that have herpes and you are not on an island. You are not dirty and are not destined to a life solitude. Yes, it's an inconvenience when there's a breakout, but it passes, just like these bad feelings will. If you have children, you have a OBLIGATION to be alive, happy, mentally well, and present for them. They need you MORE than you need to feel sorry for yourself.

See if you can find an online chat, maybe a mom's group - somewhere safe - and get a separate email or logon that you feel comfortable in using and talk with others about it. I think that you will find that SO many others have herpes and that it doesn't affect their lives in any way either, except for the occasional outbreak inconvenience.

Also, just one more thing - a reality check - THANK GOD it's not something terminal! :)

Two months ago, I was diagnosed with genital herpes.
Am a 75 year old widow and have not had any sexual contact in 16 years and am cautious in using public bathrooms. Problem presented itself after a visit to a new OB GYN. When does genital herpes present itself...does it take years?

I contracted genital herpes 30 years ago. I had never heard of it, and had never received any education about STDs. The only thing I knew was not to get pregnant -- I took the pill.

I still get outbreaks at least monthly, especially when stressed. But I live with it. Be very careful about touching and spreading it, be careful with wet towels. And be honest with potential partners.

I have never felt embarrassed or ashamed -- I was young, not at all promiscuous, and had no knowledge of these things.

I am married with 2 children. My husband got it, but hardly ever has a flareup.

After reading these posts, I'll try lysine. I always resisted taking medication, tho' have used acyclovir.

I am 22 years old and am fearful that I may have herpes. I recently had symptoms, went to the OBGYN, and am currently awaiting test results. I am terrified, just as the first author wrote. I feel like my life is over, like no one will ever want to date me again. I'm not promiscuous at all; it only took one person for me to (I think) get infected. I am sinking into a deep depression just thinking about having it. I understand that people may live perfectly normal, happy lives with kids, but the fear exists nonetheless. Does time help this fear and depression to pass? I'm currently taking anti-depressant medication and am not sure what else I can do. I feel so hopeless...

genital herpes is one of the more heavily stigmatized std's unfortunately, leading sufferers to not only deal with physical symptoms, but psychological symptoms as well. freaking out is normal and not at all unreasonable. however, the world is not so ugly as you fear at the moment. i work in a pharmacy where more than a thousand prescriptions are filled in a week. many of which are for anti-viral medication, potentially for herpes.

it's pretty common. you wouldn't stick out like the sore thumb you're envisioning yourself to be.

you're not alone. you have a virus, but it's not your identity.

I have recently learned that i have herpes. I am only 24 yrs old have a husband and a two year old. I do find myself a little down and out at times. There is a big chance my husband as herpes to we both had an out break at the same time.

I was more affected by it and ran to the doctor where i recieved a Blood test an got a possitve result. We both are unsure of how we contracted it but we are in it together. He will be getting a check up soon. He has tried to make me feel as if we are in it together threw thick or good or bad. But i know the feeling as if you are a walking monster, or dirty, ashamed, etc..

Trust me i can't say it will be okay but you are not alone i am not alone we have each other.. We are not the only ones.There many of us out there it is just a matter of realizing that life goes on and there is plenty to look forward to. This just like an obstacle course its not completly easy life is meant to a little difficult at times. But theres a bright side to things and this is not the worst we will be fine. Phsically,Mentally,and Emotionally..

I have been taking Valtrex 500mg a day. If the meds aren't ya thing then you can go the natural way just as long as you take care. As far as my first time getting my pills it took me about a week i was ashamed. Funny thing is it was nothing my husband and i were gonna have lunch with my 2 year old and on our way to lunch the subject came up so we walked into the pharmacey and i was no longer in fear of who would look or think of me in anyway. If anything between my family and pharmasist they made me comfortable more then ever. And at that moment i realize i was doing my part of taking care of my sitiuation as many other do .

I felt the same way when I was diagnosed 20 years ago. I was in my 20's and I got it from a cheating boyfriend. I didn't stay with him for the obvious reason, and I thought my life was over. It seemed too hard to have to talk about with my doctor, never mind someone I might want to have a relationship with.

I had horrible outbreaks at first, which didn't help. Nothing like a constant reminder of what I considered to be a huge mistake in judgment. I blamed myself, I was a smart girl, how could this have happened to me?

I had really bad outbreaks, in addition to the sores I had pain down my legs that made it difficult to walk. I had outbreaks almost every month with my period, and they would last for a couple of weeks. I had way more bad days than good back then.

Different things work better for some people. I tried zinc and lysine but it didn't help me. I tried Zovirax but that didn't work either. It wasn't until Valtrex came on the market that things finally turned around for me. That was the first time I took something that actually shortened the duration, and if I took it soon enough, the severity. Then when I met my husband I started taking it daily for suppression.

I understand those here who don't want the pharmacy employees to know about their HSV. I used to fill my prescriptions at a pharmacy in a different city where no one would know me. Now I only use mailorder. Nobody needs to know your business but you and your doctor.

I found some great websites years after all this started when I was surfing to find out if there were any new treatments available, and that's when I finally found out how many others were JUST LIKE ME. I think if I'd known then what I learned by talking to people who were sharing my experience it would have helped so much, I felt very alone for years. I had no idea and was too embarrassed to talk to anyone about it. What a blessing the internet turned out to be.

I've been married for 14 years now to a wonderful man who still doesn't have it, probably because I take 250 mg of Valtrex every day, and 1000 mg every day and abstain from sex if I'm having an outbreak. I stay healthy and try to limit stress. Outbreaks are no longer a constant part of my life, I get them maybe twice a year now and they are only an annoyance. For someone first diagnosed I know it's difficult to believe that one day you will be able to consider it merely an annoyance, but you will find what works for you and things will get better.

And if you are worried about the ignorant people who like to crack jokes and perpetuate the stigma, just know that the 1 in 5 number is real. Odds are very good that some day they will be faced with a loved one who has it or they may even get it themselves. It's a shame that anyone should feel like they have to suffer any illness alone, don't give other people the power to do that to you.

Wow, I am really thankful for this site, I am the mother of a beautiful 15 year old daughter who was just diagnosed with genital herpes today. Her and I both have been trying to understand more about this virus. She came to me in the night a few days ago crying and stated that her and her boyfriend of 15 months has "done it" and she had bumps down there. Initially my first thought was that he had cheated on her...but, after further communication with the doctor today and her boyfriend, we believe that she may have contracted it via oral sex while he had a cold sore. The information has been extremely relieving to me in helping my daughter through this now traumatizing experience...thanks

I was diagnosed with herpes about a week ago and when I went online to find out more info about this particular STD I got so scared when I read that once the virus enters your body it will always be there. I am only 22 years old so I have my whole life still ahead of me, but when I read all of the passages on this site they really made me feel much better about myself/life and thank you so much for the different types of solutions that I can try to decrease the outbreaks. Now I know that having herpes is not the end of the world because all I have to do is take care of myself and I will be just fine. Once again I just want to thank you all for your advice and support!! :-)

I just found out today that I have genital herpes. I contracted it (I'm pretty sure) through a re-occurring one-night stand. I am generally sore after sex, but when the soreness lasted more than a day, and I started finding bumps, I got really scared. My question is, how do you tell the person you contracted it from? How do I ask someone that I'm not "dating" that I contracted herpes...from them. I don't even know if he knows he has it. I'm 23. And I'm terrified that I'm never going to be able to get over this.

I am very encouraged by the honest and open comments here. For years, I thought about looking into a site in which people wrote about their experiences and feelings about being this, but was too ashamed! Thanks to all of you who shared. Because of you, I have been empowered do the same.

First of all, I contracted herpes from an unfaithful boyfriend. A few weeks or so after we had had sex, I experienced a sense of discomfort. I chalked it up to being a little overzealous with toilet paper (might sound funny, but I really did think I had chafed myself, because I had a tendency to do that since my childhood). I looked at myself in a mirror, didn't see anything. The next time I looked, I saw what looked like a single, small pimple.
"Hairbump", I thought, and let it go.

When the irritation persisted, I went to my gynecologist, and she said it looked like herpes. She sent the test to a lab, and the results confirmed her diagnosis. I cannot express the feeling of humiliation and sense of ... LOST-ness I had. I felt dirty, tainted, spoiled...

What really got to me was, I had deliberately *waited* until I was in my 20's before I began dating. And because I 'stuck to one boyfriend', I thought of myself as being clean and wise. But we cannot know what's going to happen, and contracting such a disease is not bound to our habits alone.

I asked my doctor, "What can I do to lower the discomfort in the meantime?? Before I can get the prescriptions during an outbreak??" I was so distraught.

Do you know what she told me? She smiled and said, "Warm, wet teabags." I thought she was a kook.

But I have to tell you, whenever I experience an outbreak, putting a warm, wet teabag on the area of the outbreak has been a sweet blessing. An hour or so after applying it, I don't feel any kind of discomfort whatsoever. I place the teabag on some folded paper towels, put it in my underwear, and go about my day. A saving grace!!!

And what's more, after doing this, most times I don't need to do it the next day at all. I don't feel anything.

I would like to say also a big thank you to the suggesters of L-Lysine (if anyone missed it, press "Ctrl" +"F" in your browser and type "Lysine" in the box). I am going to start using this as well. :)

Thank you to all, from the bottom of my heart, for your honest sharing. You have lifted a bit of the burden and shame off my heart. : )

OK here is my comments on the matter,

I am a 24 year old male, I contracted genital herpes about 4 months ago, at first i knew i had it but brushed it to the side thinking it would go away. After a few months it came back in full force. I have to admit the thoughts of Depression, Suicide, and Isolation are overwhelming at times but the truth is, this is life. You are not alone, we have all heard 1 in 4 people have it in the United States alone. If it wasn't that huge they wouldn't have commercials for it on the T.V. you know? Please take care of yourself, lead a healthy life and healthy thinking. Be happy with your life take care of the problem with medication and continue your life, it's not the end of the world.

I just learned I to have genital herpes two days ago. I was completely distraught and felt dirty, disgusting and everything else that goes with it. I am in massive amounts of pain right now, but reading these comments are helping me to feel much better. I've read that Lysine helps multiple times from multiple different sources so I will definitely try that.

I am now coming around to the idea that this is just something I'm going t have to deal with and it is not the end of the world. I thought my boyfriend was going to be disgusted when I told him (I know I got this from an old unfaithful boyfriend), but he wasn't at all. He's been very supportive, as anyone who really loves you should be.

The best way to deal with this is to talk to someone that you know loves you because if you don't you will feel isolated and alone and repulsive (that's how I felt before I talked to anyone). But after talking about it and realizing the people who love me think no differently of me my outlook was turned around.

I'm only 20 and have a lifetime of dealing with this ahead of me, bu at least I'm living, and so are you. Try to look at the bright side of things, and try to share this with someone close to you. You are still lovable, you are still the same person you were before you were diagnosed :)